Why Declining Is Better Than Ghosting
A prompt, kind decline is always better than no response or a last-minute cancellation. Hosts plan based on headcounts. Your honest "no" helps them plan and shows respect for their event and their budget.
The Simple Formula
A good decline follows three steps: thank them, explain briefly, and express warmth. You do not owe a detailed explanation, but a brief reason helps the host understand it is not personal.
Scripts for Common Situations
Wedding: "Thank you so much for including us. Unfortunately, we won't be able to attend due to a prior commitment. We wish you both a beautiful day and can't wait to see the photos!"
Birthday party: "I'm so sorry I can't make it to your birthday! I have [brief reason]. I hope you have an amazing celebration and I'd love to take you out separately to celebrate."
Work event: "Thanks for the invitation. Unfortunately I have a scheduling conflict on that date. I hope the event goes brilliantly."
What Not to Do
- Don't lie about your reason — keep it simple and honest
- Don't over-explain or apologise excessively
- Don't say "maybe" if you know it is a "no"
- Don't accept and then cancel at the last minute
- Don't decline via social media — respond through the same channel you were invited